Writer's Block #7 - 3 1/2 Days

It's Monday, you have the sickness and you just want to take things slow after buckets and buckets of beer last night. You might just throw up and you swear you don't ever want to drink again. You pick up a cup of noodles and feel it hit the spot for a moment and then some...went back up.

Then it's Tuesday and you feel better. You keep your files neat after the noodle accident yesterday. Thank God you cleaned it before anyone noticed (but you're still not sure if anyone smelled it) and it cost you a roll of tissue paper. You crack your fingers, signaling the amount of reports you'll destroy today. You just get one done and end up losing your soul in the weird crevice of the vast Internet.

It's Wednesday and you feel like a zombie buried neck deep in sh*t and dirt. Your boss is breathing down your neck and you smell what he ate for lunch: sinigang sa bayabas. He says you get things done right now or you're walking home holding an early pay envelope and a goodbye note. He can suck balls. "But f*cknuts I have to do this." You worked your ass off so hard you had to get fingertip replacements. You are drained.

It's Thursday, you're there but not quite yet. It's been a wild week at the office and your corner desk has seen too much action (and not to mention files were kept, sent, stamped and stocked;good job BTW) but you just can't speed off. Then you remember...you only have 4 days at wo--***

You're gone. Just like that, every week of the month. Now I'm clocking off. So long folks. It's a good thing to lose yourself in work but remember there's a realm beyond the desk.

But too far wander not. Rattled journeyman follow true north so you may not lose your way. Don't leave bread crumbs for the critters, once lost, dearly you will pay.

F*cknuts. Read "The Meandering Lion" for real poetry. I'm out to buy some cancer sticks.

Writer's Block #6 - Why Must They Go?

Cue in: Audra Mae's cover of "Forever Young"

We have been living in the age of TV series. We have the different genres hitting different notes for the spectrum of emotions and preferences we viewers have. Rom-coms, science lab comedies, bar tales, zombie apocalypse, blood baths and so much more. But to tinker the aperture a little bit, let's focus on the more serious series to date, those of guns and booze and swords and dragons.

TV series are governed by the principles of entertainment, inspiration and fishing. For one, entertainment is possibly one of the greatest commodities that the human race consumes. For the part of killing time, it is an escape out of the usual.

Second, inspiration strikes the audience with similarities in their lives along with personal styles that are feather-tickled by the concepts and ideas of the series.

Lastly, fishing is an important part, since all of the viewers are hooked by the dramatic, climatic and explosive episodes, not to mention the season finales that we have all so dreaded, loved and missed dearly.

To give a few examples of my more favorite series, Sons of Anarchy had Half Sack, Boardwalk Empire had Jimmy and Game of Thrones had Ned Stark. They have many things in common actually. All are cool, solid guys but aside from that...they are all dead. I was destroyed as I saw these men fall from the ranks of their brethren, gang and club they all so loved. "F*ck, they really died!"

Writers of the said TV series are brilliant: Sutter, Winter and others, Benioff, Weiss and so on. Inception of these series are just gold in their purest sense. And no doubt, when they said these characters must die, they will and they will stay that way.

It's hard to accept but I guess these characters must have had a reason to pass on to the other realm. The three were war veterans in their own accord, bayonets, bullets and great swords couldn't keep them down back in the day. But the story did in one way- the script. Such is the power of the script, dragons may lay waste to the kingdoms, alcohol be the death of all and the gun running be the end of dear Sam Crow. Their stories will continue and their deaths could not have possibly been in vain. They are remembered, with or without tombstones.

Their stories will live on: Stark's Ice, Jimmy's trench knife and Half Sack's err... ball. They must go because having them in the story could be good but their demise had the series hanging in a better way. The writers knew how to quit while they were still ahead. Cool guys always die fast.

To the lost!

Writer's Block #5 - College

Cue in: Asher Roth's "I Love College"

###

Please stop reading and burn this after you see the journalistic code for end.

Life has a loop button. You just don't know how to push it. And when you do, you don't know you unintentionally did so. Right now, I did, I'm writing again. Drifting and tik-taking away.

I sometimes wonder if I've made something worth remembering during my college days. Being a tourist student, I always saw college as a bit of a challenge. Those were the eager days, the eager years, the Mr. Brightside years of my life. The days were shiny, not to mention totally awkward once I reminisce now.

Of course there are the new friends, starting from being classmates then orgmates. You share lunch, eat together and sometimes get awe struck together since both of you don't know that your long exam was scheduled later that day. Also there were friends you lose because you chose the different sides of the fence. Names are important, even more than what you think.

There are the classes that don't seem to end but when they do, you wish you had done more. You know, not just to feel good about yourself but you realize you could have done something better with those lost semesters. You wished you could have made good with that internship, it could have been a greater addition to your upcoming resume for your would-be employers. Or you could have just slugged it out a couple more weeks to finish your NSTP course or modules.

The parties you attended were epic. No red cups (they're seriously hard to find here) but the awesome 500ml amber bottles cradled you to sleep in the most unwelcome of places- a friend's sofa, grungy sleeping beds, some landlady's carpet and even on the unsuspecting instructor's class time. Those were good times, especially with the new friends, new assholes and new problems in life that conspire after a week-long drinking marathon. Some people out there may occasionally have eaten sand or dirt, but who cares, right?

Then there are the historical battles of life during your time away in college. For tourist students like me who ventured to other regions, countries or areas with different dialects, languages and customs; there are the little victories and defeats that you'd probably have had to deal with.

The academe is one, you have to put a conscious fight to keep your wits amidst the torrents and maelstroms of peer pressure, parent concerns and budget problems. You have to tame it before you can make it do your bidding. You may have to offer your life or limb but damn it it's a true story- you will really reap what you sow and it will be all WORTH it. Handing your professor the 10-page essay exam breathes a sigh of relief, seeing your production after the last cut will be tear-jerking, holding your freshly-bound thesis for passing will cause a minor heart attack. Those days will be glorious and you will remember them as if they were just yesterday. Don't be afraid to lose a bit of your social time with friends, there will be plenty more time to kill with the buddies when you are in the private lounge of your corporate office floor.

Culture will always be a factor wherever you go. Whether it's a matter of language that you speak or the way you present yourself in front of others, students are put in a great deal of trials in this department. You can never go wrong with respect and courtesy. Drink their favorite brew, taste or *smoke* their home-grown food (herbs), keep your mouth shut for ethnocentric comments and learn as much as you can. You'll get to know that there are more similarities in people than differences, even if you were brought up in the glacial parts of the world.

Connections, romantic and platonic and even those between rivals should be nurtured and taken care of. In romance you find your passion or inspiration, in friendship you find camaraderie and baseball bat-swinging partners in crime and in rivalry you find competition and the meaning of being a sore loser and a graceful champion. You have to shell out cellphone load for this or empty your school internet card but what's that if you get to enjoy their oh-so-good company?

This post has gotten long enough, more readers may or may not have read it until this part but that's one real lesson you'll get from college. You can't be lazy even if your slowpoke badge depended on it. Sometimes, you have to read the instruction well, not just look at it and see the obvious.

Life has a loop button. Life has a loop button. Life has a loop button. Life has a loop button. See what I did there? Let's just hope you don't find the loop button when you're on your last semester, that would suck ass.

Writer's Block #4 - Boot Party

There are various things in life that make me happy. Family, my little soldier, friends, bikes...and then there are boots. I wouldn't want to turn this blog into a fashion blog and all but they are just pure swag. I see boots as the go-to for any modern gentleman: sturdy, manly, functional and definitely stylish.

Vain as it may seem but looking like you don't care about how you look will really show. Even when you're a no-fuss guy, you still have to take into consideration the way you look and present yourself to others. And shoes anchor your total look. Whether you're an office type or a field warrior, you can find a piece that you can strap on.

For those who wonder if they can pull off the boot look, the answer should be: Why the hell can't you? It's a classic, gentlemen of old, workers of the mills and mines once wore boots to the ground and looked good doing so. Even soldiers wore them for para-drops and marching on towards the gates of Berlin and the craggy streets of post-war Intramuros.

Whether it's wingtip boots, jump boots, combat shoes or the classic 8-eyes or thousand miles, you can definitely kick anything in with them. Just don't yell "Put your mouth on the f*ing curve!!!" in the middle of the night.

Boots pictured are the John Varvatos Adler, Red Wing Iron Ranger and a number from To Boot.

Writer's Block #3 - Early Morning Sins

from weaponcollector.blogpsot.com

"Wake up. Wake up. I don't wanna wake up."

There are lots of great things about mornings; the fresh brew, kawali-fresh sinangag, sunny-side up eggs smiling at you and begging for a lather of banana ketchup and toast bread, even champorado with tuyo and other wondrous things. The list goes on and on and they make you wanna dance to work, school or wherever you need to go.

And then there are the things that make you sin early in the morning. The list goes on and on, too. And your sins will keep on rolling after that if you don't keep your cool. Here are some usual morning buzzkills on my list, I'm deeply sorry, I'm a sinful nominal.

• Commuters taking too long walking up the crossing. - They could speed up and save you from cursing and mind you, getting late for your appointment.
• Scumbag fellow PUV riders. - These are really, REALLY, annoying people. They sit like a king with their legs wide open. Sometimes I wonder if they are harboring a fugitive down there or maybe they have a set of coconuts for ball sacs. You pay for the same fare but you get seated like you owe them your life. Life is indeed unfair.
• Cell screamers. - They own the PUV, and they make sure they're heard up until the next mountain. HELLO?!?!?
• The Bobble Head. - These are really not annoying for me but it's a pity that sometimes they are like dead people on public transports. They throw their heads side to side, front to back and darn it, even splooge their morning saliva on an unknowing seatmate. Poor fella.
• The morning grumpies. - These people look like they've had a years of bad luck building up to the boiling point up until the time you see them. They have an innate way of making you feel their bad mood as it resonates. Then you feel like you can't go to work anymore, it rubbed off on you.
• The 20-seater jeep that can only fit 19. - This sucks big time. You really have to fill in all the seats as the barker or driver instructs. Brace your balls, another passenger is coming.
• The BoomBox Jeep. - What?!? I can't hear you!!! *ears bleeding/soul's ears also bleeding*
• Scumbag driver. - Does not give you change or gives less change. Also, may occasionally not hear you are stopping the vehicle on purpose.
• The comfortable bed. - It's the feeling that it hugs you back that's more annoying. Curse you bed.

Actually, there are a lot more in the list but this may have to stop now. I might have to pay extra for my long list of sins. Happy cursing!

P.S. This is gonna hurt you more than it will hurt me.

Props to Weapon Collector for the image.

Writer's Block #2 - Old Friend

Friends usually have the lesser propensity to be lost in your life. Unlike your cigarette lighter that you have fondly cherished in the last 4 years or that trusty Swiss knife your friend gave you as a remembrance. Those things get lost no matter how shitty careful you are not to lose them. But friends will probably just kick your nuts in if you lost those but will probably care for you nonetheless. Those are probably the guys you would want to have your back in a bar fight or street rumble.

And there are the people who forget who you are after finding new outlets for social gratification and emotional connection. Yes, there are people like that and you may have encountered one or two along the way. And no, you can't scalp them alive. You know, it's just f*ing offensive to be deleted from their circle just because of a misunderstanding or "unstable" connection. We are not factory made parts you can just replace with brand new ones. That sucks a** but you have to realize that maybe you are at fault...which is the case some times but most probably not.

You just have to suck it in. Breathe in and out and maybe, just maybe, create a troll account and flame the little bastard to the fiery depths of sludgy hell he/she belongs to. Or better yet, just let him/her see he/she's not the only option. We are friends, I mean, eherm, we were friends. Maybe you really do need a new memory card, you need a higher disk space and a storage wiper.

Oh, and another thing. Please de-friend all my friends that you got to know since we severed all ties and connections after you did so. Thank you very much. You have a pleasant life ahead of you. You was a bitch before was I's.

Props to Tiger Beatdown for the meme. Just got to use it for the oh-so-jolly good expression.

The Writer's Block #1

Clocking in today at 8:48am, I get the papers, I turn the dispenser on, boot my laptop and read the latest news.

Honestly, I couldn't see myself anywhere else than on this make-shift writer's desk. I guess it has grown on me and I have grown on it. I'm not an exceptional writer, nor do I specialize on a field. It's just that writing gives me a sense of connection in this world of social network relationships and probably devaluating feeling of reality.

I think that nowadays, people seem to float around, kind of drifting from one place to another. I guess there's nothing wrong with it since most of us feel that some time or another. I think that that's what it feels like to be a writer by choice. You drift around, cling on to something you randomly pass by until you reach your desired destination. Sometimes, the driftwood in your travels are really gold.

That's when you hit your "Eureka" moment. You type on and on and on and you realize you're writing what's possibly one of your better pieces of late. And it is such a wonderful feeling to just see your words fluidly illustrate your current state of mind, emotion and opinion. You just float there, and you wander off to some other place.

But of course, there are days that you just can't seem to get your fingers moving. Words don't come out. It may take hours, days, weeks and God forbid, months. It may happen on work, in school, in meetings, exams or your leisure time. Yes, that sucks ass but you can't force yourself into writing a masterpiece you can't even visualize. Just wing it. Then pull the trigger if there's one in the chamber.

Now I'm just drifting away. Tiktak-ing on my keyboard. I guess this is going to be a long day.

The Ace of Clubs

This could probably change your mind...about anything. I am a very big fan of hand made knuckle dusters. This one is very creative in design and maybe functionality. It could look good on a desk as a mean paper weight and a very good conversation starter.

Some of you may think that this its very odd for people to like these kinds of stuff but really, collectors are no harm. It's the users that you should be worried about. Carriers are probably equally dangerous but only carry for security purposes.

Trivia: Boxers back in the day usually slip in one of these knockers in illegal boxing matches. As well as old-school gentlemen who get home late from work, anticipating the hoodlums in alleys or stray gangs. Soldiers during the two world wars also favor this weapon for personal use and possible "self-expression" for the enemies. Another version of this is the "trench knife."

Props to Weapon Collector for the picture and ownership. Just had to share this. Stunningly beautiful work, literally and figuratively.

Just a Thought Cloud

Sometimes, it is all a matter of mindset.

Sometimes, I can’t decide whether to buy something I have really liked for so long just because I think I am spending way too much.

Sometimes, I think too much and I forget what really needs to be done.

Sometimes, I see myself in the eyes of others.

Sometimes, I know I don’t need something but I still want it.

Sometimes, it is all a matter of mindset.

Ever since I knew what I was going to be, I always thought about the “what could be’s” in my life right now. I could be possibly writing for my dream magazine or I could be enjoying my Fridays out with my best buddies, getting wasted and meeting girls. I could be living the working class life: giving my parents the share of my salary, looking and sounding like a big shot in front of others, spending more than what I can or living off the side of a mountain. I could possibly have a girlfriend to have a go-meet with her socialera friends in their up-town gigs and perky talks about the latest craze in their Barbie world.

It is fun thinking about these things. These are some things that get me by in my jeepney rides to work or my afternoon stroll outside the compound. Yes, they may seem painful and of course, why wouldn’t it be painful? This smells and spells REGRET all over, upside down or inside out. It stings some times.

But the reality, not the sad part is that it is just a thought cloud in my made-up comic world. It is a figment, gone in *poof* but is relive-able in probably one of the most entertaining ways. And the fun part starts with this short thought cloud. It is probably a slow day today, for me, for the office, for other people as well. And this prods thinking. I could probably get those things I mentioned earlier. Or I could just live with what I have.

I could probably enjoy booze on weekends but that wouldn’t be good for me. I still have to think about work on Monday. I could wish for better, bigger pay for a lesser or an equal load but that wouldn’t be right. Sometimes I think it is all a matter of mindset. Back then, I wished to graduate, then I did. When I graduated, I wish I had a job, then I did get one. When I landed the job, I wished I had the pay of yuppie puppy clad in designer brands and on the latest 4s. Then I figured, I wouldn’t be happier with that.

I have a decent work. I get paid honestly. I have good friends and I enjoy the good company. I have a loving family and they are healthy. I should be content with what I have, not wish for more that I could possibly live my life without. Magnum (the ice cream, not the condoms okay?) sounds good but I can enjoy dirty ice cream equally on a sizzling Philippine afternoon. It is probably safe to say that we tend to live our lives right now based on what we want to have, we are pushed to go distances because we want a new car, a new dress, a new cabinet of shoes or whatever. We have the things that we need, though improvement is not bad, opportunity will present itself sooner or later. But for now, we just have to be more content and more patient.

Tom Shadyac described this human mindset, compared it to a cancer that eats up its host and dies after. The cancer as a parasite takes more than it needs and kills its host eventually killing itself shortly after. This shouldn’t be the case with us.

Sometimes it is all a matter of mindset. And what you read is just a thought cloud. *poof*

BTW, this blog liiiiives. Resurrected from its internet grave.